Resources

If you’re experiencing anxiety, you should know that there is probably nothing wrong with your brain.  Sadly, many people are told that their anxiety is rooted in a brain problem.   Your brain is likely functioning fine. Most often the real source of anxiety stems...

 I’ve heard many people say, “It stresses me when I think about confronting my boss. I could never do that” Lots of people would agree with that sentiment: “Of course you should be nervous about confronting your boss.”  But is that true?  When I was in law...

Want to learn how to make your anxiety worse?   Be upset because you're upset.   Many within the mental health profession talk about it and recognize it as an important component in helping people with anxiety. Yet, we rarely let the public at large know about it. In...

When I was a police officer, my friend Ray was promoted to Sergeant. Back then the culture of my department was highly competitive, and a promotion usually meant being disliked by many of the patrolmen. Ray was worried because he believed that the officers would...

Are you a people pleaser?  Do you avoid conflict at all costs, worry about disapproval from others (even people you don't like), or losing a friend? Concern over these outcomes can lead to deep anxiety.   Are you passive and have trouble saying “no”?  There are many...

Jessica constantly worried that her husband would have an affair. She began to obsess over the idea and became hypervigilant. He never gave her any reason to believe that he was cheating on her, but that didn't stop her from worrying.  Jessica often badgered her...

“You need not suppose that the soul is at peace when the body is still. Sometimes quiet means disquiet” (Lucius Annaeus Seneca, Letters 56.8)  When you’re alone at home, are you still anxious?   Is your down-time not so relaxing?  Despite the quiet of your external...

We often underestimate the importance of structure in our lives. We mischaracterize structure as confinement that must be shed in order to reach our “potential.”   But what can structure do for us? I would argue that healthy structure facilitates calm, creativity, and...

Throughout my experience in coaching and therapy, I’ve had the privilege of helping many people transform from People Pleasing to a more balanced way of life.  One topic I cover with clients involves anticipating the responses of their social network. Many relatives...

In order to discover one grateful person, it is worthwhile to make trial of many ungrateful ones. (Seneca, letters 81. 2)   True friends - people of quality who have character and are worth our time, are also worth the search. So don't be discouraged; they're out...