About Catherine Hunt
Let’s look at a day in the life of my counseling practice.
Like many on their first visit, Bob* seemed a little uncomfortable. He sat at the farthest end of the couch, tapping his work-worn cowboy boots on my rug.
He began by reiterating our conversation on the phone – that he’d never talked to a professional about his relationships, but he was tired of talking to friends and family.
Although he knew they cared about him and meant well, they weren’t professionals.
Then, Bob started to explain.
“I met this woman. I thought we were great together. I thought I loved her. It was good until about two months ago when things went sideways. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know what to think. She said she needed space and told me to leave.
I thought: she needs space?
I’m in my mid-50s, and I’ve been married before. I’m too old for this. I mean, neither of us are kids anymore. We should both be beyond so much drama. I care about this woman, but I think there must be another guy. I need help and want to talk to a professional who knows about these things. That’s why I’m here. This relationship is just too important to me.”
Kimberly* and I had worked together for about a month.
Kimberly and Trent*, her boyfriend, were both in their 30s and lived together. The two were contemplating marriage.
Well, they had been.
Kimberly wanted to be married already, as she was ready to have kids, but Trent wasn’t so sure. He wanted that MBA, so he thought they could wait a few years. The relationship became testy, and Kimberly had that sick feeling of “here we go again.”
Here’s how she described her pain:
“I don’t know what I’m feeling. I’m scared and maybe a little numb. I’ve put so much time into this. What else can I do? I don’t want to start over again. He gets angry with me over silly things and admits to having doubts. What am I supposed to do with that? Try to convince him? My last relationship was toxic. I love Trent, but I don’t want to go through this again.”
Rachel* and Todd* had been married for over ten years.
Rachel was a schoolteacher, while Todd recently became a partner in his law firm. Their son was in elementary school, and the relationship had endured an infidelity.
For over a year, the two had been bickering constantly. Rachel preferred fighting things out, but Todd found conflict exhausting. He’d emotionally checked out of the relationship, and their sex life dwindled to nothing.
They danced around divorce, but neither was ready to throw in the towel. They knew they were headed down the wrong road and needed help.
Todd said, “I just don’t want to do this anymore. I’m tired, and I want to deal with things constructively. I want to stop fighting and resolve something.”
Rachel said, “I don’t know that he loves me anymore. I feel him pulling away – blocking me out. Maybe he loves me but isn’t attracted to me anymore. I fight with him because I want him to engage with me. At this point, he’s not even doing that. I need to be seen and heard.”
Where do we learn about relationships?
Most of us learn this stuff growing up. Like most people, I learned about relationships by watching my family. My parents met and began dating at age 13. They married before Dad joined the military and stayed together for 50+ years. It was a long marriage, yes, but was it a successful marriage? I don’t know.
In the past, couples received congratulations for a successful marriage if they’d been together for decades. By modern standards, however, long marriages don’t necessarily equate to good marriages.
Most couples today place far more demands and expectations on this coveted relationship.
Nothing impacts the quality and trajectory of our lives like our relationships. That’s why it’s CRAZY that no one teaches us about them!
Many clients say they would have made very different choices if they had known then what they know now. They would have handled their dating life differently and been more strategic in their choices. It may not sound romantic, but it’s reality.
The truth is that relationships can make or break us.
We’ve all seen how relationships can affect teenagers. A teen can be doing great in every area until they meet the wrong person or group, and then their trajectory changes. Good kids mixing with the wrong crowd start to decline. Conversely, a lost kid introduced to a good circle of friends can change their trajectory for the better.
The same is true with adult relationships. We all know that friend who was doing excellent until they got involved with so-and-so, and then things changed.
Once you had a great life and career, then things changed for the worse. Nothing can derail you like a toxic relationship and a nasty, prolonged, and expensive divorce. I’ve worked with many successful professionals crushed by the emotional turmoil of a relationship gone bad.
Haphazardly dating and choosing a life partner is a high-stakes game with real consequences.
But it’s never too late to change your course by making different choices. Call today, and let’s discuss what’s going on during your free consultation: (863) 450-6333.
*These are fictitious names and scenarios used only to illustrate real-life situations.
Hi, I’m Catherine
I’ve been a therapist for over ten years.
Many individuals and couples I work with experience stress, anxiety, anger, sadness, loneliness, and other feelings due to unsatisfying, disruptive, or toxic relationships.
I help clients make considerable shifts in their lives by combining scientifically proven Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) with Structural Family Systems Therapy (SFT). CBT helps the individual, while SFT addresses the unhelpful patterns of communication and interaction within the relationship.
Before becoming a therapist, I was an FBI agent.
I’m at my best when in service to others. I’d always been interested in studying people and culture; I tried to satisfy this by working in counterintelligence and terrorism.
I took every course on interviewing, interrogation, and recruiting I could find. I became an FBI Certified Crisis Negotiator and did three temporary duty tours at the U.S. Embassy in Egypt after the 9/11 terrorist attacks.
In 2005, I received an appointment as the Assistant Legal Attaché at the U.S. Embassy in Baghdad. Iraq was nasty at that time, and the Green Zone had been taking regular rocket fire. I clearly remember the day the sirens were blaring, and I was hunkered down in my quarters, repeatedly asking myself, “If I get out of here, how would I like to spend my time?”
There’s nothing like the clarity that comes with life-threatening situations. I learned a lot about myself.
Things changed after that.
Through deep soul-searching, I realized I wanted to be a therapist and work directly with people on a more personal level. For me, the role of a therapist is another form of service.
After completing my tour in Iraq, I resigned from the FBI and enrolled in a clinical social work program to start my therapy practice. The rest, as they say, is history.
I’m now a licensed psychotherapist working with adults, couples, and families. Nothing excites me more than to watch the lives of my clients improve and thrive!
Are you ready to address your problems and find real solutions that last? If so, reach out today. Let’s talk more during your free consultation: (863) 450-6333.